Not With A Bang
by charmingbexi
Summary: A character study of Rose when she gets shot in Last Sacrifice. Now with added Dimitri.
1. Rose

I've been out of writing for so long now, but I'm trying little by little to open myself to it again. And it starts with this little piece. Enjoy.

Rose's world ended not with a bang, but with a- no, actually, it was with a bang. A sharp, gunshot sounding, pain tearing through her chest, bang. Her breath was caught and her body was in a moment of stasis while it communicated to her brain what she was feeling, what she should be feeling. But she felt nothing but a numbness radiating from her centre and a strange warmth blossoming outwards. It was an odd sensation, one she could honestly say she'd not felt before in all her injuries past. There was either a biting pain, or the endorphin high from a bite, or an ache, but numbness was a first. It was like the anesthetic had already been administered in the future knowledge this was coming.

Her knees gave way before she could fully comprehend that she had indeed taken the bullet meant for her best friend, and she collided with a steadier than her something on the way down. Arms encircled her as both bodies met with the floor with enough force to expel the air in her lungs in a painful whimper. Sound came rushing over her with startling force; her name sobbed with painful disbelief both in her mind and her ear in the same sweet voice. Lissa. Her name wretched loudly and angrily in a scottish accent. Mum. Angry shouts as Guardians subdued the immediate threat. But the low melodic voice laced with a Russian accent she wanted to hear most in this moment of uncertainty never uttered a word.

Encased in her best friend's arms, Rose's eyes searched for him as she took her first breath since being shot. They connected instantly with his as he fell to her side blocking the view of anything else in the room, and disconnected just as quickly when she closed her eyes as a burst of pain shot through her, pun intended she mentally snorted in a sick moment of humor, and she lost that first breath quicker than it had come. A choked whimper left her lips as she reopened her eyes to the world. Her view, were it her last as she were sure it would be, was her entire life summed up, she thought. Dimitri and Lissa. Her heart and her soul. Though those titles, she thought, were entirely interchangeable. Both had the biggest parts of her heart and both had left the biggest imprints on her soul, not even counting the bond. If these were the last faces Rose was blessed to view, then she was very blessed indeed she figured, the edges of her lips twitching into a smile for them.

She was unrepentant in her actions. Her life had always been dedicated to Lissa from the moment they'd traded names in kindergarten, and this was the biggest act of love and loyalty she could share with her best friend as a Damphir and Guardian. She felt a slither of peace that her loved ones would know that, and that it would ultimately help with their grief. But this moment was what she had been born for, had trained for all her life. And, okay, being brought down by a mad Moroi wielding a gun was so totally not the way Rose had seen her death happening but it was happening. She'd 100% believed her blaze of glory would be a Strogoi attack in which she valiantly gave her life in the line of duty, fighting and protecting. Instead her life blood was pouring from the wound on her chest at an alarming rate by the help of a tiny piece of metal. But at least it was her life blood pouring from her chest and not Lissa's. She'd never forgive the guardians that had been holding her if they'd held her just that little more securely, enough not to be able to reach Lissa in time.

Her mind wandered to an alternate course of action where she'd not anticipated events in time, and it was her leaning over Lissa. The shudder that wracked her body was not only from her trying to catch another breath, but from the onslaught of pain that that particular though brought her. No, she was much better suited to this predicament, besides, Lissa potentially had two races to reign over and lead towards a better future. And what a future that would be. She could only imagine the things Lissa could bring to fruition with her own reign as monarch of the Moroi and Damphir races. Whatever it would herald, it would be one Rose was sure she would be proud of.

As her thoughts had raced along, as if her brain wanted to catalog every thought she possibly could in the limited time she had left, Dimitri had pressed his hands to her chest, trying to stem the flow of blood and give her a few precious extra moments. Lissa's thoughts of healing echoed through the bond, but hands had already begun pulling the blonde away from her, trying to finish her job in keeping the Royal Moroi safe. And though she saw Lissa struggle against the hands pulling her away, she knew this time Lissa would not be bringing her back from the chilly embrace of death.

Her eyes flickered back to her Dimitri's and she wished she could erase the hopeless, fearful look from his face as he gazed down at her. She knew this hurt he was feeling. Had lived and breathed it for so many months prior. She wished she could comfort him, let him know as long as he loved her, she'd be able to go with a slither of peace in her heart. That till her last breath, though more than likely only moments away she figured as she grew tired, that she would love him unerringly.

As she watched him she thought of their recent reconciliation, and the first and only pang of bitterness welled up in her. She had been happy. She had been ecstatic. She had been in love and for the first time in so long had been able to bask in Dimitris love, and once again, when they'd both been lulled into a security that they were each others, one of them was going to leave the other behind.

She saw him mouthing her name, or maybe he was speaking it, but she couldn't pay attention long enough to listen for his voice. Something she was annoyed with herself at, because if there was ever a sound she'd last like to hear, it would be her name on his lips. She could imagine it though, how the R would wrap around his tongue and it would feel positively decadent to her to hear him call her Roza in these last moments with him.

But her eyes were heavy and she had no energy left in her to listen as he pleaded with her not to let go just yet. She felt herself be lifted from the marble floor, pain lancing through her, verbalised with another whimpering sound, and then felt no more as she succumbed to her blood loss and lost consciousness. She could feel her own eyes mentally rolling one last time as she humorlessly corrected her first though. Her world would _not_ end with a bang, but with a whimper.

So, that's that. It was more of a character study than anything and a "Can I get a feel for this character to write them well enough?" thing. I'm open to comments and suggestions, even prompts to help me get back into it all! Bex


	2. Dimitri

Being a Guardian took dedication. It was a lifelong commitment to keeping your mind and body sharp and the protection of the Moroi. For those of us belonging to the Dhampir race, it was the most common path in life. Though, for the few, it wasn't just a job; for some of us, it was a calling.

Roza was one such person I would undoubtedly say had a calling for the role of Guardian. I had seen it the moment I met her, with those wild eyes and her unflinching demeanor. Not many would offer their lifeblood, in an act that was seen as taboo in our society, just to keep their Moroi safe.

So it was a shock to no one that knew her that when the Princesse's life was being threatened, Rose was by her side in an instant. The real blow came from the identity of the person who was putting Vasilisa's, and thereby Rose's life, in jeopardy. And that was Tasha. Tasha; a good friend, and for Christian, his closest relative. Someone we all trusted.

I had so many questions and no answers for any of them. When had my friend lost her way? How could she have murdered our monarch and then framed Rose for it? And now, when the truth of the matter had come out, why did she feel like her only course of action was to take a gun and threaten people with it? This was not the woman I had called a friend for so long.

It was because thoughts like this were racing through my head that I initially missed when the gun found itself pointed at Lissa, and in doing so, I failed in my first lesson to my Roza.

I hesitated.

But Rose did not. She moved. It was her movement that brought me into the present and automatically prompted my own actions to keep her from harm, though I was too late. The gunshot rang out, and I watched in horror as Rose was hit by the bullet.

In a scene that was as macabre as my nightmares, I watched as Roza tumbled backward with the force of the bullet. Being so close to Vasilisa, her best friend caught her on the way down, the momentum knocking them both off of their feet.

For the second time in as many minutes, I hesitated, my eyes taking in the blossoming red on her chest, starting so close to her heart, and I felt everything stop. My own heart, my world, my everything stopped as I witnessed the undoing of my Love. Distantly I recognised the terror that had gripped the assembled at the gunshot, just as I identified the various calls of Rose's name.

I was on my knees by her side before I knew my body had moved, her name caught on my tongue. With shaking arms, my hands were firmly on the wound the bullet had caused, hoping to slow her bleeding, hoping to ward off her death.

'Please, stay,' my mind begged her, still not able to sound out the words as I searched her rapidly paling face, 'You can't leave me.' Her beautiful features were marred by pain, though she seemed to be somewhat conscious of what was happening around us as she moved her eyes from me to the blond-haired Moroi next to me. I swore I could see a smile try and pull at her lips, one that spoke of her pride at following her duty, her affection for the both of us, and of her acceptance of what would happen next.

I felt numb and panicked all at once. Rose couldn't leave us, she could leave me.

Was this the punishment I had been waiting for? The balance for all the lives I had taken as a Strigoi? For me to learn that I could love her again, to actually have had the privilege to fall in love with her a second time, and then watch her die?

Honestly, I deserved much worse, I should not have even been allowed to live, but Roza did not deserve to be the tool used by God to punish me. She was bursting with so much life and promise and beauty that a gaping hole would be left in the world where she once resided. One that neither I nor the world could overcome.

"Roza." The word wrenched from my lips painfully, panicked, as I saw her eyes flutter closed. She had to fight, she was always the strongest of the two of us, Rose had to do this for me now, even as she faded, Rose had to be my strength and pull through this.

I couldn't do this without her.


End file.
